A Fifth of a Century…

So…last week I turned 20…and I don’t feel it at all!!!

I’ve never been a “birthday” person.
I never liked the idea of celebrating a birthday nor throwing a party to let other people know that you’re slowly getting old
I know, it’s a bit of a pessimistic vision, but that’s the way I am.

Of course, I do get it when you’re a kid: you eat loads of cake and sweet, receive amazing presents, get your face painted or do whatever kids may wish for their birthday nowadays… But I still don’t get it once you start growing up.
Don’t get me wrong, I might even fancy the idea of doing something on my birthday, but the point is that I do not understand why I should do it “just because it’s my birthday”. If I would actually want to do anything special, the only thing I need is to be in the mood and to have the will to do it.

Take last week, for example.
I turned 20 and I didn’t do anything special to celebrate it. I didn’t throw a party, I didn’t get drunk nor I asked for any presents… It might sound really sad or depressing, but the fact is… I didn’t want to do any of that stuff.

The only thing I did for my birthday was to go out with lunch at Five Guys, which makes the best cheeseburgers and chips in the world, but I could have easily done it at any other day of the year. I do not need to wait for my birthday to treat myself to a Five Guys cheeseburger!

Maybe it’s just because I simply can’t understand how the whole concept of “age” works. I just see my age increasing on the paper, while I don’t feel like getting old at all!
I mean, consider 20: it’s 1/5 of a century…
Nevertheless, I still feel like I’m 16 years old and sometimes feel the need of acting like one, except I feel like I can’t because I remind myself that I’m not 16 anymore…I’m 20.

Plus, sometimes I find myself thinking that these 20 years passed really quickly and I really haven’t done anything I feel as incredibly remarkable and I start wondering whether the next 20 years will fly as well and what will I do when I’ll realise that another 20 years have passed and I’ll already be 40 years old…
Will I be married? Will I have kids? Will I have a nice house and a nice car? Will I have accomplished everything I wanted to do when I was 20? Will I have brought to life all my secret project that required time and money to complete?

Who knows… I guess I’ll answer all these questions in 20 years…


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